A Glowing Christian Future

Peter Costello is a True Believer

He believes in The Free Market, and in God and His Commandments.

In order to demonstrate that his commitment to God is not just a-cheap-stunt-intended-to-secure-the-votes-of-Christian-fundamentalists, Peter & the Test Tube Tories have pledged that, under a Coalition Government, no altar to God will have steps; people ascending steps might expose their genitals (Exodus 20:26).

Recently, Peter had a Dream:

I saw a man, possibly Arnold Schwarzenegger, firing randomly with a weapon at people on the streets and many were falling dead. I was very disturbed and was crying. Then the scene changed and I saw fire everywhere with flames burning very high and Barack Hussein Obama dancing like Billy Elliot. With this I awoke from my dream with the interpretation as the following words came to me in a flash from the Spirit of God, ‘My wrath is about to be released upon Australia, in particular environmentalists, for not approving the construction of a series of cheap, safe, energy-efficient and environmentally-friendly nuclear power stations across the length and breadth of the country. Now, call on My people to repent and pray!’

We will never understand the way in which God moves, nor when The Real Nelson Mandela will be released. But we know that if His people pray, He will hear that they will be a bright, glowing, light to the nation, Brighter Than A Thousand Suns; and the nation will be covered and protected by Godly people; and the Godly people will be in radiation protection suits; giving direction and standing for it in prayer…

About @ndy

I live in Melbourne, Australia. I like anarchy. I don't like nazis. I enjoy eating pizza and drinking beer. I barrack for the greatest football team on Earth: Collingwood Magpies. The 2023 premiership's a cakewalk for the good old Collingwood.
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One Response to A Glowing Christian Future

  1. @ndy says:

    Can you believe we’re being plagued by religion still?
    These Christians aren’t about to give up.
    It’s the same countless fools go on and on and on and on and…
    Closest thing to witches I’ve ever seen,
    Let’s get out the gas and set them on fire!

    Aw, teach me how to pray, good Christian.
    If it works you’ll all be dead.
    We’ll see the secret to salvation,
    For me it’s when you’re dead, you’re dead, you’re DEAD.

    I can’t believe they’re serious,
    Superstitious spastic fools.
    They live for everlasting life,
    And ruin my life here on earth.
    They must be SO intelligent,
    To know so much more than me…
    I wanna take the president,
    Chop off his head,
    And mail it to them in a garbage bag.

    Hinkley had a vision,
    Hinkley had a vision.

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